Top 5 Reasons to Date a Female Rower:
Hello click bait for all you rowing gals! I went into this article expecting to be flattered, but as I got further into it, I felt like I was getting a backhanded compliment from a bitter, friend-zoned guy. The points are valid, but compare it to this article:
Top 5 Reasons Why You Should Date a (Male) Rower.
Apparantly dating a male rower is like having a real life GI Joe doll as a boyfriend and dating a female rower is like having hungry alarm clock for a girlfriend.
Naturally, I was pissed and tried to write my own list of why you SHOULD date a female rower. I quickly realized that there are some serious cons. Eventually, it spiraled down into this:
Reasons NOT to Date a Female Rower
(accompanied by pics from my personal library)
She’ll eat you out of house and home
She can squat more than you
Her hands are disgusting
She won’t stop talking about rowing
She’s taller than you and still insists on wearing heels
She will never go out on a Friday night because of Saturday morning practice
She does everything with her teammates, and her teammates are crazyyy
She feels the need to be 10 minutes early to everything
She plays to win no matter what
She is always tired because she wakes up before dawn to row
She goes to bed at 9 and still schedules naps into her day
She puts more energy into her athletic performance than her appearance
If she has to decide between you and rowing, she will choose rowing.
This list made it seem like dating female rower is like dating a tired, hungry, athleisure-wearing, goal setting, psychopath, so I went back to the drawing board. Turns out, a list of things we DO isn’t going to make us seem alluring because we do some insane sh*t to become great rowers. I think we are put in a better light when our attributes are highlighted rather than our actions.
That list looks more like this:
Reasons Why a Female Rower is a Good Life Partner
She values friendship and loyalty
She knows how to handle pressure and cope when things get tough
She has learned to support the people she loves by pushing them when they need it and comforting them when they don’t
She knows when to joke around and when to be serious
She has a big ego, but is simultaneously humble
She always knows what she wants to eat
She takes risks because she knows that failure is an opportunity to learn
She understands the importance of balance
She is confident and strong
She will never give up on something that is important to her
Being a rower makes having relationships inconvenient, but the sport of rowing creates really amazing people. Rowers have their quirks, but the positive attributes of dating a rower outweigh the negative side effects. She might be in the library, at home on a Saturday night, napping in the back of class or rippin an ergo at the boathouse, but if you can find yourself a rower to date, you won’t be disappointed.